Tuesday, April 17, 2012

hurting people's feelings

my mom claims that i do whatever i want and never care what anyone else thinks. not sure if she means in a "free spirit" kind of way or a "screw everyone else" kind of way. maybe both.

i would argue that i agonize endlessly over what other people think. am i making them uncomfortable? insulting their integrity? more importantly, am i hurting their feelings?

sometimes the answer is yes. sometimes i know the answer is yes but it doesn't mean that it sits well with me.

other times i worry so much that my stomach hurts; maybe i even cry about it.  the funny thing is that only half of those times are warranted; the conflict begins and ends within my own mind. i have literally made myself crazy for nada on more than one occasion.

apart from providing proof that i am not made of stone - what is the point of all this worrying? if i did indeed hurt someone's feelings, agonizing over it isn't going to make them feel better. and if their feelings aren't hurt? then what am i getting so worked up over?

sometimes i think i literally can't distinguish between my own feelings and someone else's

1 comment:

RolandoE said...

rule # 1: do not care that much about what your mother (or father) thinks. is soothing.