also written a year ago and not posted:
it's been too long since i last wrote
years
i'm afraid i might have forgotten how...
like when i stopped speaking to my kids in spanish and then when i tried again, instead of answering me (albeit in english) they would say "speak to me normally!"
i'm afraid to write again and afraid to not write.
do i know how to put my thoughts into words that properly express the complexity of my thoughts? maybe my thoughts aren't so complex...
but how many memories will get distorted or forgotten in the time that elapses without any record keeping if i don't write? i know enough to know that i don't trust my own memory. i rely heavily on the photographs i have taken or the thoughts i scribbled down to serve as a sort of impartial memory keeper. they don't get tampered with out there.
so i will write things down, to not forget.
there is something so beautiful and also so sad about remembering
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