pain - it's relative

i went to the doctor today and he told me that despite the bump still living on my shin (a fraction of the size it was two weeks ago, but still very much present) i had his permission to play soccer again this week. all he said was, "it's all about how much pain you can withstand"

and i remembered a friend of mine saying once how pain was so "personal" (she is french, and so maybe she would have chosen a different word, but i think personal works). there is no way to measure pain except against one's own history and memory of it.

it sort of reminds me of this conversation that comes up again and again with people about perception, and for some reason it is always explained/described through the way we see colors. "what if my red is your purple?"

it also reminded me of a show i went to see a couple of weeks ago called bellona: destroyer of cities. it was an interesting piece - way out there, for sure. and there were so many things going on that i think many of them alluded me. but i remember the protagonist getting the shit beaten out of her in one of the beginning scenes and reacting unsettlingly unaffected by it. later in the play a woman gives a very honest/harsh criticism of the protagonist's poetry and this time her response is something like "that was the most painful thing i've ever felt". it's all relative.