10th anniversary of turning 21

it was my birthday a couple of days ago.
usually the anniversary of my being born generates a lot of anxiety for me - not because i am getting older (i don't think...but maybe?) or something to do with what i have and have not accomplished in my life, or maybe just because of the attention i do or don't get on that day. not sure.

this birthday felt different - relaxed; and although very hot and humid, also very enjoyable. part of the day was spent with family, the other part with friends. all of it with erk.

and because these landmarks are a good time to do so - i thought i would do an inventory of my year. but rather than listing places i went to (not that many) or world records that i broke (none) i thought i would do some more internal inventory. here is some of it:

i lived outside of new york for longer than i ever have before in my previous 30 years of life. it was a difficult adjustment full of frustrations: getting lost, cursing the philadelphia transportation department, feeling disconnected from my friends and family in nyc. but like any other transition, this one took time, and i think helped me grow.

my vocabulary also grew. i know more about plants and construction than i ever did before (this is of course relative to the fact that i knew nothing before) and in knowing more about these things, i have been more inclined to stop and notice them. the nicest ones to notice are the ones i looked at all the time but never actually saw.

i quit my job and found another one

i discovered for the first time how deeply i could fall in love.