time: it's relative

i distinctly remember how slowly time passed when i was a kid
a day was an eternity
the future never came
"growing up" was a concept but could never actually become a reality

everything between that point and now has become a blur; my teenage years, my twenties, the career choices i put off making

and suddenly i feel time shift more dramatically in the past six months than it has in the last 30 years.

it's as if it has both slowed down and sped up simultaneously

m forces me to take in the present. as much as i try and plan/daydream about the future, there is nothing like the immediacy of her needs and wants, laughs and cries, to bring me right into the moment i am standing in.

but i also notice how her laughs and cries have changed; it seems as though from one day to the next. and so the present is here, but on fast forward. "when is 'now' now?"* i want to feel the eternity of a day again with her.

i take pictures and shoot videos in an attempt to keep these moments, but of course the moment i take them they are gone, and she has already grown, is already learning something new, looking at the world through a different lens.

as her perspective shifts so does mine.


* spaceballs